My body collapses into bed Im so tired, yet my mind is racing. Ed's voice is stronger than ever. Telling me how fat and ugly I am, making me feel guilty...having me count over and over every single calorie i put into my mouth that day. I want to cry and scream, or anything to drown out the voice that controls my thoughts every single minute of every day.
When I finally fall alseep, it's as if Ed is controlling my dreams too. Nightmares. So many nightmares, where I'm all alone, where i'm fat and disgusted with myself. When I wake up, it's as if I'm still dreaming..wanting to wake up...to get out of this nightmare.
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